So, tell me about yourself…

This series is inspired by my experiences dating as a (mostly) straight, cis-woman in her late twenties in the San Francisco Bay Area.

I figured I should start with a bit about myself. I’m a Midwest transplant who still feels new-ish to the Bay Area. I came here by way of grad school and because it’s cool to pretend to act embarrassed about it, I’ve held off until the third sentence of this “About Me” to tell you I work in tech.

This is probably about the right time to also admit, or rather, state obnoxiously: I am a feminist. I believe access to contraception is one of the number one things that will improve social and economic outcomes. And, I’m sex-positive, the 2020 way to proudly declare, “I’m a hoe!” (although locals will say they’ve been using that phrase since the Obama administration).

JK, but if you’re pro-trump, please see yourself out. Seriously.

Because you’d likely be offended by a lot of the subject matter in the upcoming posts. This series will explore the world of modern dating in SF, what it’s like to be single after a nearly eight year relationship, and touch on a few personal stories that inspired me to write this blog.

Here’s a few:

This series talks about sex, makes references to drugs and alcohol, and contains a good amount of cursing, ‘cause I am one foul-mouthed bitch.

Selfishly, I’m also using this medium to write out and process some traumatic experiences I’ve had in the world of relationships. These more serious posts are not meant to suggest anything about local dating culture. Rather, they simply provide another perspective from my own lived experiences, albeit kind of a dark one.

I’ve always loved writing. One thing I thought I could give voice to and seemed to be on many young-ish people’s minds is how awful it is to date in this phase of our lives. The weird late twenties period where if you’re not already married or in a serious long term relationship, you’re wondering “Well, now the fuck what?” As my one tinder match so eloquently put it:

Not sure if this resonates with you but I think were at a age where were probably established in our career and need to look inward to make sure we’re properly setting ourselves up properly for the rest of our lives.

G, Tinder Dude
Fucking mood, dude

Maybe you’ve moved somewhere new for the first time. Maybe you’re working towards some big goal for physical, mental or emotional wellness. Maybe you’re starting your second, third or fourth career, who fucking knows? Whatever the case, it seems as if we’re starting a new chapter in our lives. Yet we have one finger tucked in a few earlier pages of bad breakups or the frenzied energy of our earlier years.

And then, like the dumbasses we all are, we say to ourselves:

I know what would be a great idea. Let’s find someone else to bring along for this fucked up ride so I don’t have to be alone.

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